Breaking: April Fool’s Day Called Off Due To General Agreement Shit Already Weird Enough

trump queen

Just another day, in a messed up century. 

With global absurdity levels at an all time high, in an eleventh hour decision the United Nations has moved to cancel April Fool’s day for the first time since Pharoah Ramesses told Moses he and his people were absolutely free to go.

For his part, Donald Trump stated that while he was disappointed he would have to shelve his planned joke of telling everyone he was quitting Twitter, he was relieved he would not have to pretend to quit Twitter. 

While in the U.K., 19 consecutive votes on the matter of whether or not to celebrate April Fool’s resulted in a parliamentary stalemate, and general agreement that maybe it was time for a national nap instead. 

Reached for comment on the unprecedented move to stop what in the past was viewed as a relatively harmless distraction in a generally sensible world, António Guterres, Secretary General of the UN, kept his message short and acerbic.

“What’s the point? How can April Fool’s day be any weirder than any of the other days of the last few years? It cannot. I suggest we all focus on restoring order in our world, rather than swapping the salt for the sugar, inane bullies for leaders, or general regression in the many areas we’d formerly been making strides in.”


For more semi-satire, follow us on Facebook at The Out And Abouter, or on Twitter @OutAndAbouter.

Categories: Life, Politics

Tagged as: , , ,

5 replies »

  1. I can’t figure out if the ways of the world make satire and parody easier….or harder??? Great piece. I keep sharing you on FB, although I worry some of my friends take your posts literally!!!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s